What started out as a giggle fit of psychologically off balanced googling, ended in a 2012 corporate diary calendar prit stick general arrangement of a vague route between Covent Garden and Mongolia.
This was initially a joke, before SiriSiri georouted the travel time and the penchant for Pandas in bikinis grew. As Jimmy mounted our poorly sketched journey on the wall, the paroxysm of fear and bubblegum hysterics became a reality.
As word spread like an awful rumour about this navigational insanity, humans swarmed with naive enthusiasm, joining the non existent team Bikini Panda. So far, the growing comrades include the requirement for around half a dozen further vehicles.
The Swift, always covered in roadsmog filth and practically tattooed with "Me So Dirty Girl - Clean Me" smudged down the drivers door, appropriate when rolling up next to law enforcement vehicles, will be my desert mountain chariot.
So far, in preparation for the 2015 Mongol Ralley these measures have been taken:
-As part of the Mongol road testing experience Jimmy witnessed with his hands covering his eyes in bed wetting fear, the first water test conducted on a flooded stretch of rural A road.
-The internal ambiance control was tested in a 17hour endurance M25 experience one comparatively mild summers day, and the conclusion was that an Air Conditioning system would be implemented through the chainsaw removal of doors outside of the developed nations.
-The hubcap kerb incident of 2012 was also a perfect reiteration as to the necessity of run flat tyres and global breakdown cover.
-In a BMW msport we near achieved anti gravity lift on a 4km Private West Berkshire driveway, we have yet to test this feature on the Swift but with enough dedication to fear suppression we might meet this target.
In short, the thought of driving across the nearby landmasses for four weeks with the gang, actually induces feelings of terror.
If you're thinking of stepping uncomfortably out of your comfort zone, get to the google machine and check out the Mongol Rally pages. It's a fantastic opportunity to test everything you have by doing something a little extreme!
Anyone signed up for 2015?!
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